Tucker Carlson is a Pussy

You won't believe this exchange from Tucker Carlson's show, nor the product he and his guest end up promoting. The formerly bow-tied one was joined this week by [ahem] "producer" Willie Geist and the discussion turned to Hillary Clinton, a woman of whom both these douchebags clearly have a healthy and well-deserved fear.

GEIST: Well, I think the metaphor in this next story, Tucker, is pretty
clear. So I will just report the straight facts. The newest collector's item on
the presidential campaign trail is a Hillary Clinton nutcracker. They're going
like hot cakes in Rochester, Minnesota, where the idea for the nutcracker was
hatched.




It's a Hillary doll with serrated stainless steel thighs that, well, crack
nuts. If you can't make to it Minnesota to pick one up, you can go to HillaryNutcracker.com and that could be
yours for the low, low price of $19.95. They'll also throw in a bag of Hillary
nuts for five bucks. Now, I don't know what they're getting at here, Tucker.
What do you think they're saying about Hillary?




CARLSON: I don't know, but that is so perfect. I have often said, when she
comes on television, I involuntarily cross my legs.




GEIST: I know you do.




CARLSON: I'm getting one, by the way.

What could he possible need one for? The man has no nuts.